Many of you know my story of weight loss and any time I write about the topic, I think it’s important to share that I am not just giving “counselor advice” in this area. Even though that could be useful, it might be helpful for people to know that I understand first hand the reasons weight loss and maintenance are so challenging. If you have not read about my journey, you can catch up on it at “112 lbs and Going”. It hasn’t been easy but well worth every pound. I know you can reach your goals too, with enough motivation.
One thing I have noticed in myself and other people who are wanting to make lasting changes in their health, is that we all seem to have what I call a sabotage weight. It’s that number on the scale and/or clothing size that when we achieve it, we start back-sliding on our good food choices and exercise diligence. The sabotage weight is where we often will lose down to but struggle to break through that threshold. It’s the weight where we yo-yo up and down. It’s THAT weight. Do you know your sabotage weight? I know mine.
How did I figure out this magical number? I was stuck there and even with a “desire” to get beyond it, I remained stagnant at the same spot. There were reasons of course. The sabotage weight is where we lose enough to feel better in our clothes and even though we may say we want to lose more, our actions show something different. This weight is where the rubber meets the road on how committed we really are to reaching our health goal.
Some folks’ sabotage weight is 10lbs more than they want. For others, the number is a lot more than that; but the subconscious sabotaging is the exact same. Our stuck point is where we feel sort of okay about ourselves AND get to enjoy living in the way we desire to. Now, I know people will say that they don’t feel okay about themselves, but my answer to that is they feel good “enough” to not be motivated for lasting change. Sorry. But we all know it’s true. Might as well just say it out loud and be honest with ourselves.
At the sabotage weight, we whisper to ourselves things similar to:
“I have done good and lost some weight. Time to celebrate!”
“I should feel good about what I’ve accomplished. Why still deprive myself now?”
“What does it matter if I keep losing weight? My life hasn’t change that much so far.”
“People love me at my current weight. No need to give up the things I enjoy.”
“What am I losing weight for anyways?”
Do any of those sound familiar? Until we start recognizing these inner conversations and develop good answers to them, we will remain at weights that are not yet our ideal. We have to develop anti-sabotaging behaviors and fight our way through the emotional wall that holds us back. The amazing part is that once we wrestle our way past the sabotage weight, we have healed at a deeper level and can experience more successes in our goals.
What’s your personal version of this inner dialogue that sabotages you when you’ve reached a certain level of weight loss? What does that conversation sound like?