I see a lot of women clients. My practice is not solely women but they make up a large percentage of the folks that have come through my office over the years. If there was one common theme I can say that I have seen among a lot of my female clients it would be this: Being in love with a man who allows his people to cause hurt and harm to her and their relationship.
Mr. Right’s people come in a variety of shapes and sizes. Some of his peeps are his buddies who try to be underhanded in discouraging Mr. Right from honoring his girlfriend, fiancee or wife. Mr. Right’s peeps might be his former spouse and/or his older children from that relationship. They may also be Mr. Right’s relatives; parents, sibilings, cousins, etc.
You will know if your Mr. Right has human baggage because you will fight about them often. He will say things to make you think that his peeps are not a problem but in fact you and everyone in your world know that they are a serious problem. You are often left hurt by his peeps and Mr. Right just doesn’t seem to get it when you have tried for the gazillionth time to explain to him why their actions are hurtful.
So, what does a smart girl do if your Mr. Right has human baggage issues? See a counselor. Quickly. Doesn’t have to be me but see someone! There are layers and layers to be worked through so that Mr. Right can honor you and insist that his people do the same. Leaving this topic undealt with is a recipe for hurt feelings and lasting resentments.; if the relationship survives at all.
I am often told I should write a book. If I ever did, this would be the topic. I would love some blog reader feedback. Would a book on this topic be of interest to you? email me your thoughts at firstname.lastname@example.org